"Real Artists Ship"

One time Steve Jobs, the legendary Apple mastermind, said "Real artists ship." Since Jobs uttered this phrase, it has been repeated countless times by countless people. Most who use this Steve Jobs quote are in the tech industry, where they understand the importance of bringing a product or technology to market.

I have not seen anyone use Steve Jobs' quote in the book industry, or in reference to any other artistic endeavor, even though Jobs makes reference to artists. I am sure Jobs was trying to convey to people in Apple that they were not engineers, programmers, etc only, but also that what they created should be a work of art.

Whether you love or hate Apple and Steve Jobs, you must admit that his business accomplishments are impressive. More authors and other artists could learn about marketing and business in general instead of only busying themselves with the intricacies of the English language, plot development or how to best develop characters. In the new world of book marketing, authors are playing a larger role in promoting their work, driving many of the marketing efforts themselves.

I cannot tell you how many people I know who have been working on books--both fiction and non--and yet they continue "perfecting" their works for years and years on end. If these authors were to incorporate Steve Jobs' philosophy in their work, they would realize that they are not really writing unless they are putting their writings in front of readers. Your book will never be perfect, so continually obsessing over it not being perfect only delays you from getting your book in front of readers. If you are concerned about people criticizing your work, I would suggest you either reconsider your desire to be a writer (since we writers are continuously criticized) or that you find a way to deal with criticism since every job I have ever had comes with some degree of critical review.

Real writers get their work to market one way or another, where people can see it, otherwise they are just playing.

Grammatical and Usage Failures Abound

Nobody is immune to grammatical (and usage) failures in the English language. But as the saying goes, to heir is human (typo intended). As a writer I am more in-tune with language than most, and so I pick up on grammatical errors everywhere: store signs, newspapers (or news websites these days) and even major publications. And yes, I pick up on some of my errors after publication, which is always fun.

Large companies are not immune to grammatical foibles, despite their massive resources. Take, for example, the typos on collegiate shirts being sold at Old Navy stores, with misplaced punctuation as pointed out by Shine. Not nearly as surprising was the use of "your" instead of "you're" on some shirts for The Wet Seal.

And that brings me to some of my grammatical pet peeves. It really grates on my nerves how many people think "they're" and "their" and "there" are all interchangeable. I am less annoyed by people who cannot get "too" and "to" straight since it is a difference of a single "O." I cannot believe how many people abuse the word "that." Most people can delete about 90% of "that" out of their writing and be just fine.

Writing full-time I have learned to drop some constructions I used to favor in the past. "In order to" is evil, so now I just write "to" which floats much better and unstilts my language. I had a college linguistics professor who pointed out that people who stilt language are insecure, and encouraged us to avoid such usage. I also now avoid the word "therefor" since it also is stilted and often completely unnecessary. "Anyways" is one I hear a lot, but rarely do I see it in print. "These ones" and "those ones" also grates on my nerves like nothing else. Isn't it much easier to say "these" and "those"?

In general, just avoid using words you don't know the meaning of. I cannot stand how people abuse the word "ambiguous" when they mean "vague." Perhaps most ironic is when people use "grammar" when they are talking about language "usage."

Sigh, this is the lonely path tread by writers, editors and college linguistics professors...

The More I Learn the Less I Know

A wise man once said that as you learn more about the world, you begin to become much more aware of the limits of your knowledge. I had someone once explain this concept by drawing a small circle, demonstrating someone with a small body of knowledge. The circle's circumference represented the limits of the person's knowledge, as well as the person's awareness of information he is lacking knowledge of. This person then drew a much larger circle, representing someone who had gained more knowledge. While the size of the person's body of knowledge had grown, so had the circumference of the circle. In other words, the person with more knowledge had also gained more knowledge of information he did not know or understand. I hope that explanation was not confusing, because it makes so much more sense when drawn out (at least it did to me).

I am always at awe of people who have attained a certain level of knowledge through schooling or even personal pursuits, and who begin to act like they know it all. If anything, I am the opposite. The more I learn about the world, the less I feel like I really know. In a way this can be a discomforting thing, since I am constantly being reminded of my own limits. Still, though, this doesn't keep me from learning more, but instead drives me to learn more.

Some educated people I know laugh at anyone who believes in anything paranormal. These people seem to love to couch all of their beliefs in the understood science of today. While I have a great amount of respect for modern science, I am at the same time aware that science has its limits. Those who do not acknowledge this are fools or are extremely uncomfortable with the concept of uncertainty, and so they create for themselves an interesting cognitive dissonance. My education has actually lead me to become even more convinced that there are some very interesting things that science has no way of explaining. I don't jump at any old story of someone supposedly seeing Bigfoot, but I also do not dismiss things simply because I don't understand it.

Anyone who has experienced a strange episode in their life that defies all present scientific knowledge can appreciate the limits of human knowledge. There's nothing like such an event to make you keenly aware of how little we truly know and understand.

Evil Editors

For anyone who doesn't know, there is a lot of animosity between some writers and editors. I swear it reminds me of fighting cats and dogs who fight because they are supposed to or something like that. I have to admit that for the most part I don't have any problems with editors. In fact, I usually find their input and advice to be quite useful. Editors help catch my mistakes before I air them out to the whole world, helping my writing look that much better.

Then there are the editors that fall into the category of evil. I would say that less than ten percent of all editors fall into the evil category. Evil editors are the ones who live alone because they are so critical of everyone and everything nobody really wants to be around them. Maybe these evil editors live with a cat or two, since these are the only beings that can stand to be in the same room as them. These editors are smug, conceited and cynical about everything. Their edits aren't really helpful, since they only tell you what's wrong with your writing but never offer advice for improvement.

I took an English usage class in college, and it was the toughest class I ever took (along with economics 110 with a final that took me four hours to complete). A good portion of my class was editors, some of whom worked for our school's alumni magazine. A good portion of these editors fell into the evil category, and they thought they knew everything about the English language. My professor, however, knew more about the English language than them or anyone else I have ever known. I still daily use things I learned from that class. I studied my brains out for the final, which we took in class. I was one of the first people to finish the test. My professor graded it right there while I wrung my hands, and then he proudly declared to not only me but also the entire class that I did not miss a single thing on the test. Let's just say I was not the only one surprised, since these editors didn't think much of me and my non-editing career.

Really, though, a good editor is priceless, but bad ones are a dime a dozen. The funny thing is bad editors think they are so special and indispensable when in fact they are pretty much just a sticking point in the creative process, not a resource, and will be tossed out once someone wises up and finds a suitable replacement.

One thing that always gets me is when editors change the meaning of what I have written, and yet my name goes on the piece. This is perhaps the most annoying thing about know-it-all editors who know nothing about the subject you have written on. I have also had some editors actually insert grammatical errors into my work and will not budge on removing it. Equally as irksome is when an editor removes any creativity from a piece, leaving it sterile and not very fun to read at all. Please, if you are an editor reading this and you are angry or don't get why these things bother me (and many other writers) go be a police officer or some other job that satisfies your craving for cruelty and an exercise of quasi god-like power. 

Writers Hand/Wrist/Back/Body: Blah!!

Writing can be a hazardous profession, despite what some people may think. Sure, we don't run into burning buildings, kick in doors at crack houses or stand behind the counter of the local convenience store, but we can become injured on the job.

Yes, that's right: writers are prone to workplace hazards. Take a look at this website if you don't believe me.

I calculate that on the average week I write about 40,000 words. To those who do not know how many words that adds up to, many novels have about 120,000 words in them. With all of the typing, as well as clicks with the mouse, a writer can easily develop pains in the wrist, hands, fingers, back, etc. Of course, a lot of these problems can be avoided by using proper posture and positioning of the keyboard and mouse. It sounds simple, but when you're concentrating hard on what you are writing, sometimes you forget to sit just so.

And so I and other writers deal with the hazards of the profession. I guess the benefits of the profession outweigh the risk of injury, or at least I think so.

Thinking of Killing a Chupacabra? You May Want to Think Again

Ever thought of hunting down a chupacabra, or any other type of cryptid (unverified creature) such as Bigfoot? If you have a hankering to shoot such a legend (or what you think is a legend), you may face legal trouble.

Don't believe me? Check out this story that was featured recently about a Texas youth who shot and killed what he presumed was a chupacabra. It seems his actions have angered both animal rights groups, and that law enforcement in Texas may be interested in pursuing charges.

What I have always wondered, and now it seems that I am not the only one, is why some people think that if they do see a strange animal it is their God-given right to shoot and kill it. My suspicion is that these people either don't think, or they are thinking they will gain fame and perhaps fortune from their actions.

Maybe now these people will think before shooting. But then again, I wonder how many of these people follow the news.

Can Horror Be Clean?

I must admit that I don't really enjoy most horror books or movies. I'm not really sure I would classify what I write as horror, even though some people contend that it is. I view my work as paranormal fiction writing, most of it with a suspense bent to it. I have a problem with the horror genre in general: it is too gory and perverse for my taste, overall. Of course, there are exceptions, but for the most part I think horror stories go too much for shock value instead of just telling a good story. I like scary, but I don't think excessive gore or erotica adds to the scary element at all.

When I wrote my first paranormal thriller, or horror novel, Shadow House, I came under fire from some horror-centric people who said the book was too "tame." I knew what they meant was it was too clean since it features no sex or gratuitous violence. The language in the book even is not over-the-top. The funny thing is, though, that I constantly hear from people who do not normally like "horror" books telling me how great Shadow House is. I also get people complimenting me on not loading a bunch of garbage in the book, choosing to focus on real scares and a character-driven plot.

Some people say you cannot have clean horror, that it just doesn't work. Maybe they're right, and maybe what I write isn't horror at all. I don't really care, since all I really want to do is tell great stories and entertain people.

Why You Shouldn't Sell Your eBook for Less Than $3.99

With the fairly recent advent of ebooks, quite a few people are still trying to figure out how best to market and sell them. One common question among independent authors is how much should they charge for electronic copies of their work. I am going to boldly declare that as a writer you should never, ever charge less than $3.99 for your work.

Some protest this idea, saying they are unknown and must charge $0.99 for a novel. What do I say to that argument? There are a growing number of independent musicians out there, but most of them don't charge $0.99 for their album--that's what they charge for one song.

There's an old saying that you get what you pay for. If there are readers who only want to pay $0.99 for a book, they must not be looking to read anything worthwhile. If these readers would understand the work and dedication that goes into writing a good book, they would gladly pay more than $3.99 for one.

Think I'm the only one saying this? Check out Dean Wesley Smith's blog post about independent publishing and his discussion on price. 

There is a principle in marketing called prestige pricing. In prestige pricing, you charge more for a quality or prestigious item, and people will pay the price. Your product must offer a compelling reason for the higher price, but if you are doing your job as a writer that won't be an issue. Instead of peddling your hard work for a penance, sell it at a decent price and forget the people who want something for nothing.

The Great Salt Lake Phantom

Utah has a surprising amount of paranormal activity. Much of the classic paranormal events are interwoven with Utah’s unique history, and the legend of the Great Salt Lake Phantom is a prime example. Many have heard of the shrieking phantom who haunts the shorelines and islands of the large saline lake, but very few know the history behind the ghastly appearances.

Life in early Utah was different in many respects. The story of the Great Salt Lake Phantom starts with former Utah Governor John W. Dawson, who had been accused of unbecoming advances on a female citizen of Salt Lake City. A group of three “desperados” decided to enact some justice of their own, catching up with Dawson at the stage station in Mountain Dell. The three outlaws - Lot Huntington, John P. Smith and Moroni Clawson – were tracked down three weeks later by a posse lead by the legendary Porter Rockwell. Rockwell shot Huntington to death and the other two surrendered and were brought back to Salt Lake City and the custody of the local police. Soon after the transfer of the two prisoners, they were both shot to death by Salt Lake City police officers after they attempted escape. Clawson’s body was not claimed, so it was buried in potter’s field at the city cemetery. He was buried on the city’s dime, and one of the Salt Lake police officers purchased burial clothing for Clawson.

Legend says Clawson’s brother George lived out East. When he learned of his late brother’s demise, he went to Utah to collect the body. To the surprise of the authorities and the outrage of George Clawson, when the casket was opened Moroni Clawson was inside, naked as the day he was born and face down. Reportedly George was ready to sue the city and anyone else involved in such a disgraceful act. Salt Lake City Police launched a full investigation, and that was where the story gets truly interesting.

John Baptiste (or in some accounts he is called Jean Baptiste or John the Baptist) had moved to Salt Lake City three years previous. Baptiste was Salt Lake City’s first gravedigger and was known for his strong work ethic. No problems had been unearthed with his work until this point. The police investigation focused intensely on Baptiste. Police went by the Baptiste residence, finding only his wife home. The police also found boxes upon of clothing, all of which belonged to the dead. Henry Heath, one of the police officers, was horrified since he had buried his own daughter not too long before. Heath feared that his daughter’s clothing was “among the motley, sickening heap of flesh-soiled linen… found in the grave-digger's hut."

When police confronted Baptiste, he confessed to the despicable crime of robbing the dead. Some have accused him of robbing the dead of more than just clothing and jewelry, adding further gravity to Baptiste’s crimes. When the news spread around the city, keeping Baptiste safe and in one piece became a hat trick for authorities. The stolen pieces of clothing were displayed for the public to claim, drawing large crowds of horrified grievers.

Unable to convict Baptiste of anything more than a felony, the judge in Baptiste’s trial could not impose the punishment of death so many pressed for. Instead Baptiste was to be banished from the community. He reportedly was branded with the words “branded for robbing the dead” and then left on Fremont Island. The only thing found on the desolate island located in the Great Salt Lake was a shack and some cattle. Officers went to the island several months later, only to find the roof and walls of the shack missing and a cow slaughtered.

Speculation about what happened to Baptiste circulated in the community. Some thought he was successful in making a watercraft and had made it to Montana. Others said he probably drowned in the salty waters, receiving finally his death sentence the law was unable to impose.

Thirty years later, a group of duck hunters found a human skull in the Great Salt Lake near where the Jordan River empties into the lake. Three years later a hunter in the same area came across a headless skeleton, complete with a ball and chain around one ankle. Controversy about whether the remains were from Baptiste or not popped up in the newspapers.

Regardless of the controversy, both Utah residents and tourists have been witness to strange occurrences at the shores and on the islands of the Great Salt Lake. Witnesses have described seeing a man walking along, wailing in pain and agony. The man has been described clutching a wet and rotting bundle of clothing. The south end of the lake, where the unidentified remains had been found, as well as Fremont Island itself have been the sites with the most occurrences reported.

Despite the reported activity, investigations performed by paranormal researchers has generated little to no evidence of paranormal activity. Before anyone decides to conduct their own research on Fremont Island, it is private property. Permission must be obtained from the property owners before venturing onto the island.

Read the Salt Lake Tribune's article on John Baptiste by clicking here

Read a Deseret News article on Fremont Island by clicking here