Paranormal Fridays: The End of the Mayan Calendar in December of 2012

I thought it was appropriate that my first paranormal post of 2012 covers the whole end of the Mayan calendar and end of the world prophesies for December of 2012. I know there is a lot of talk surrounding the end of the world that the Mayans prophesied a long time ago, and I am here to clear up some misconceptions.

First off, I have it on good word that the world will not explode in December of 2012. Instead, a wide-scale extraterrestrial invasion of Earth will happen. The result will be humans farmed for slave labor, with a select few being used as hip hop entertainment dancers on some alien spacecraft (the aliens just can't seem to imitate our grooviness). How do I know this? Well, I didn't watch all of those seasons of the X-Files for nothing, you know...

Some people wonder how the Mayans could have possibly known about the end of the world. Well, it's pretty simple when you realize that they studied the stars. After all, everything you need to know about future events is contained in the stars. Now, don't ask me how exactly that works, since I just took physics and other science classes that talked about stars being large balls of gas. Obviously there is something about stars I just don't understand.

So how did the Mayans come to have such vast knowledge? I'm not sure, but I'm going to guess that it had something to do with their love of playing soccer with their enemies' heads. I mean, honestly, any culture that plays a sport with dismembered body parts has my attention when those same people predict the end of times.

How does the Mayan calendar work? It's complicated, I will tell you that much. There is a lot of debate about whether the calendar actually ends in December 2012 or whether it is the end of one calendar and the beginning of another. For an intimate discussion about the complex workings of the Mayan calendar and concept of time, click here (it'sWikipedia, but the sources listed at the bottom are actually quite interesting and helpful).

According to NASA, though, the end of the world talk is a bunch of talk, and nothing more. The scientists at NASA apparently have looked into claims that the stars tell that the world is going to end, and I'll have you know that they have interviewed each of those stars thoroughly. NASA's ultimate conclusion is that the world will continue on past the end of the Mayan calendar (which ends, by the way, at the winter solstice). They also predict that we have to suffer through several more years of bad music on the radio thanks to Lady Gaga.

So what am I going to be doing in December of 2012? Hopefully I will be watching the rumored new X-Files movie.